End The Cycle Self Study Program

For Women Who Want Clarity And a Plan To Exit A Narcissistic Relationship (Even If They've Tried Many Times Before)

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“Before the this program I was overwhelmed, my head was spinning, I was constantly hurt and in distress and had no clue why other than that my relationship was unhealthy. This program helped me to see the dynamics at play, know that I am not crazy or the one causing the chaos, know that yes I do play a part in the dance and to take responsibility for my own wellbeing. These are valuable life tools and essential when dealing with a covertly abusive partner because generic advice doesn’t work with them. I feel like I armed with the tools I need to move forward.” L.G

In many toxic relationships, there is a cycle of abuse characterized by periods of tension, followed by explosive incidents, and then reconciliation or a temporary calm. This cycle can create a sense of hope that things will improve or that the abusive partner will change, leading the victim to stay in the relationship despite the harm it causes.

Can You Relate to the Following?

  • You avoid confrontation with your spouse because he he turns every conversation about the relationship around on to you leaving you feeling at fault for the relationship issues and conflict
  • You're done trying so hard to explain how you feel and constantly feel shut down and dismissed. You start to feel unworthy of love and connection and wonder if you will ever know what healthier love feels like
  • You have fights about the same issues over and over again, and nothing changes. You go to the cupboard for chocolate, or pour a glass of wine to numb yourself from the anxiety and stress you feel
  • You crave a loving connection with your partner, but no matter how you try to communicate, or initiate changes you want it always ends up in a fight, and you feel at fault for bringing the issue up in the first place
  • You keep doing more to balance your work and career life but your relationship takes up a lot of space in your mind, you can't focus as you ruminate and obsess over him and what he's doing (or not doing).
  • You are smart, and have a successful career, make good money, and have a close circle of friends that love you, but in your relationship you constantly second guess yourself and wonder if you're making too much of things, or if you are misunderstanding his behaviour
  • You often find yourself swinging from feeling you want to leave because the behavior is so intolerable, to feeling hope when he’s “being nice” and promising to change, to wondering if you've tried hard enough to questioning if he really is a narcissist, back to self blame, back into the cycle
  • You often feel confused after interactions with your partner that leave you questioning yourself, and wondering if you really are going crazy
  • You're doing all the things to feel better, you read books, listen to podcasts, go to therapy, exercise, eat well and take your supplements, and even work with a naturopath, but no matter what you do you're exhausted physically and keep pushing yourself juggling work, home and parenting, you feel like you're failing, so you push harder to do more

You're ready to take back your power and stop wondering "is he really a narcissist? Or am I reading too much into things?"

“End The Cycle lifted the veil on what is going on in my marriage. I have been unhappy almost my whole marriage and I felt so much guilt and shame that I was unhappy. Seeing behind the scenes and understanding covert abuse dramatically elevated the feeling that I was a “bad wife” for not liking my husband. ETC radically opened my eyes to MY POWER. I am SO much stronger than I thought. I am SO much more divinely powerful than I EVER thought. Radically shifting my view from victim to empowered! THANK YOU! ETC helped me see that I am not alone!! For years the dark fog of abuse had me confused and believing the illusion that I was the only one living this way. I thought I was broken, I believed my marriage was shit because I was too sensitive. I am WORTHY of healthy love and connection”. J.K

Here's What You'll Be Doing Inside:

Module 1: Get Clarity on The Cycle And A Definitive Diagnosis of Narcissistic Behaviours and Your Role In The Dynamic:

  • Understand the cycle of abuse and the tactics and behaviours to know for sure if this is what you're experiencing (even if you have doubts or aren't sure)
  • Learn how to calm yourself down and so you stop reacting in ways that perpetuate the cycle (that he can use against you later) and you can feel good about how you're showing up no matter what he's doing
  • Learn how you're playing into the dynamic, how to stop feeding the cycle, regain your inner peace and stop feeling controlled and powerless in your life
  • Unhook yourself from the emotional addiction to the drama which is driving you to keep ending up back in the toxic cycle
Walk away with a clear understanding of narcissistic abuse, the behaviours, tactics and manipulation they ALL have in common, and how to remain in your power and no longer feel powerless over your life. No more second guessing yourself. Once you have this clarity, it is much easier to move into phase 2. Lean back!

Module 2: Take a Break To Get Clarity on Your Part in The Dynamic

  • Lean back and stop trying to control your partner and relationship. Start redirecting your energy and focus toward yourself and building up your own life. THIS is a total game changer!
  • Stop enabling bad behaviours. self sacrificing, overhelping, over-functioning, over-giving and enabling behaviors keep the dynamic alive and actually prevent change from happening
  • Detach from the outcome when you start to change your part in the dance and STOP doing all the work to fix the relationship and mange the home, kids, finances and all the things you do to fill the gap for your underfunctioning partner
  • Redirect the energy toward yourself rather than on your partner and the toxicity and drama cycles
Walk away with the ONE and only solution to disentangle from the web of narcissistic abuse and control. You can implement this no matter where you are with your decision to stay or leave. This one method I teach you will serve you for life, and you will no longer feel controlled by how they are behaving. And this sets you up perfectly to move into setting your new dealbreakers, needs, and non-negotiables. This will make it crystal clear whether you can actually stay in the relationship and thrive.

Module 3: Stop Abandoning Yourself |Define Your Boundaries, Dealbreakers and Nonnegotiable Needs

  • Define what you want and need in your relationship. Know your dealbreakers and ultimatums, while standing firm in the consequences you will act on if they are not met with changed behaviour
  • Learn why talking about your boundaries alone doesn't work (and what to do instead when they are not respected)
  • Learn how to build embodied boundaries and how to stand in them without guilty, or like a bad person
  • Learn the 8 Types of Boundaries And How to Set and Enforce Them
Walk away with the foundational understanding of how to set boundaries with people and partners who disrespect you. Learn the types of boundaries and how to enforce them without repeating yourself over and over. Learn the secret to setting powerful boundaries without more ineffective communication and conflict.

Module 4: The Self Reclamation Process |
Coming Back In To Relationship With YOU

  • Lift the veil of confusion and seeing things as they really are. Your confusion is self sabotoge!
  • Take 100% ownership for where you are, and learn why it is the only way to change your patterns and life
  • Embrace your self reclamation and start becoming the woman you truly are
  • Break your codependent, people pleasing patterns of putting everyone else first and start putting your needs at the top of the list
  • Create your holistic self healing plan with rituals, and self care practices that embody your mental, emotional, spiritual and physical wellbeing
Walk away from this module with a solid self care foundation that embraces your whole being. Implementing this inner work will serve you as you navigate your next steps, and help you reach your vision faster once you leave, with your wellbeing at the forefront. 

Module 5: Should You Stay Or Should You Go? Getting Clarity + Planning Your Next Steps

  • Get the essentials in place now, even if you're not ready to leave yet, so that you're prepared when the time comes. Know exactly what you need to get organized BEFORE you actually leave the relationship.
  • Preparing for the emotional storm as you take steps to leave and afterwards
  • Learn self soothing tools and practices for when you're triggered or experiencing intense emotions
  • Things you MUST make sure of when it comes to writing and signing legal agreements (and protecting your children) that if missed, could cost you big money and lost financial support for your kids
  • What to do if you decide not to leave or don't feel ready to make that choice
  • Identify your personal psychological blocks and limiting beliefs that have kept you stuck in this relationship, learn more empowering ways of thinking and shift your beliefs to ones that support your new life vision
Walk away with your first clearly defined steps to move out of the relationship based on your goals, situation and current circumstances. You may not be able to leave right away, but you will be equipped with the plan, mindset and strategy to carry out your exit within even the most difficult, complex situations 
ENROLL IN END THE CYCLE

Maybe right about now, you're feeling terrified that by joining you'll have to make a quick decision to leave your partner, and you don't feel ready to leave

The advice to ‘just leave’ isn’t always wise guidance. Some women need a plan for getting to a place where they can leave and feel more prepared to take that final step.

This program is not about forcing you to make a hasty decision about whether to stay or go. And, I know you may still have doubts that leaving is the right choice. It makes sense you’d give this careful thought, and this is why the program is a step-by-step process specifically for women who are still unsure if they should leave.

ETC is about giving you the process and tools (backed by a therapeutic approach) guiding you to make your own decisions by doing the inner work necessary to change your unhealthy patterns… because in the end, nobody knows better about what to do about your life and relationship than you do. 

How Is End The Cycle Different Than Anything You've Tried So Far?

For starters, I have a background in Counselling Psychology,  Mindfulness Based Coaching which I obtained at the time of my training. I combine coaching methodologies with holistic principles, and psychology, to bring you a powerful combination of both modalities. 

I have also lived my own experience with narcissistic abuse, so I have the advantage  of understanding exactly what you’re going through.  I combine this learned wisdom with my professional training, and 11+ years experience working with clients. 

I created this program so women could study and implement the modules around their busy lives, and I am confident there is no other program like this out there. 

You not only get the classroom education with the module work, but you also get 24/7 access to a community of women just like you who are working through similar things.

You will be learning from other women, having insights from the questions they ask, so it’s like you’re getting years of support condensed in to just a few months!

My promise: If the only thing you do right now is dive in and commit to doing the work in this program, you will not recognize yourself by after going through the first module of the program. Your life will be transformed. Whether you stay or leave, you will not be the same. This program radically and permanently changes women’s lives in ways years of therapy never could!

Take a Tour Inside The Program Portal

Imagine...

  • Coming home from work and being able to to whatever you want, when you want- blast music and dance in the kitchen when the inspiration strikes
  • Waking up in a peaceful environment every morning, without walking on eggshells
  • Having time and energy to do the things you love, see friends and pursue hobbies and interests you've lost, or plan a trip
  • Being able to sleep soundly through the night, no more insomnia or racing thoughts
  • Feeling more like yourself every day and showing your kids what a happy mom looks like
  • Creating a sacred space for you and your kids exactly how you want it, and not have to worry about anyone else's opinions
  • Your self confidence skyrocketing to new levels, and this allows you to take bold steps to create your new life
  • Improved health, more energy, ongoing ailments begin to disappear
  • Making more money because you are setting bigger goals, getting a promotion, new job, or uplevelling your business with your renewed energy and mental focus
  • Every aspect of you life getting better, clearer and more peaceful. You love yourself and your new life!
  • Dating and experiencing being treated well, finding new love and new possibility
  • Being more of who you are, and experiencing more joy, peace and freedom to reinvent your life
  • Feeling free to make your own decisions and not having anyone make you second guess yourself
  • Being a better mother because you are at peace and free to be the mother you know you are meant to be

“I came across this course at the exact moment I needed to, and it has been beyond valuable. In all honesty there were moments where I felt like I wasn’t make any progress, and ones where I doubted that I ever would. But just doing the work- reading and listening and actually writing out my reflections really did result in clarity. Suddenly my needs and the beginnings of some real boundaries were right in front of me, in my own handwriting! I feel more in tune with myself than I think I ever have, and I am so grateful for you Leanne, and this incredible course. Thank you so, so much.” J.P

1 Installment of $897
6 INstallments of $165
12 Installments of $91

  • Lifetime Access to the End The Cycle Program
  • Access to the ETC Facebook community 
  • Previously recorded coaching calls to get inspired by hearing other women get coached
  • Q & A and interaction with in the Facebook group (no need to attend live calls)
  • Updates to the program at no additional charge

BONUSES:

  • Coparenting with an Ex Narcissist Class ($47 value)
  • Plan Your Empowered Exit Intensive This is a pre-recorded class all about the legal aspects and how to prepare to leave while protecting your children ($97 value)

Over $147 in BONUSES!

   6 and 12 installment plans available at the checkout.
Enroll on end the cycle

The ETCE program rapidly and permanently changes women's lives in a way that years of therapy could not

Women Answer:

"How did the program most help you?"

(Identity is omitted to protect confidentiality)
"ETC helped me recognize the cycle and learn not to emotionally react. Having online support for insight into personal situations so I could relate it to the material".
"Receiving validation, support, and the tools that I need to move forward in whichever way I decide".
"I familiarized myself with gaslighting stone walling etc . Gaining clarity. And having a supportive group behind me".
"I'm in the ETC program and learning so much I wish I knew prior to leaving my ex!" K.R
"I have learned self care/self love/boundaries how to use and practice them. In setting myself routines, and learning about abuse cycles. Knowledge is power and I have learned so much through Leanne's ETC program."
"ETC has helped me to be empowered and know that I am not alone, crazy, or asking for much, learn ways to communicate effectively to not allow myself to self sacrifice all the time and keep boundaries in place, and helped me connect with other women in similar situations and find ways to break the cycle".
Benefits of ETC

How is ETC More Beneficial Than Going to Therapy?

"The journaling prompts and having some type of “homework” was very helpful. It gave me things to take action on instead of just talking about things."
"ETC made me realize my codependency and my "role" with some of my past relationships with men. ETC dives deep in to narcissism and personality traits that go along with it. ETC reminds me to let go of the "victim mentality"; providing me with an awareness and accountability for myself. I matter."
"ETC offered specific information that helped me understand not only the spectrum of narcissistic behavior but also my own role in the relationship. ETC also hammered home the importance of self-care as a means to place the focus on myself as well as highlight how self-care practices are essential to staying well physically and emotionally."
"The accountability and an outlined directives for self soothing and regulating emotions have been most helpful once aware of codependency patterns."
"ETC is way more actionable and future-focused than therapy."

What Women Like You Are Saying About The Program:

"Before stumbling across awakening women on Instagram, I was confused, being manipulated and emotionally abused, daily. I didn't even know what gaslighting was. I was often crying, not wanting to proceed with my day, tangled up with my partner. Everyday now, [after working with Leanne and the ETC program], I empower myself more and feel better. I am in a healthy routine and bettering myself now, I'm learning about energy and I am motivated to protect mine. My focus used to be on my partner and everything he was doing. Now my focus is on me and my kids. I've changed the way I react to him and slowly but surely disconnecting myself from the toxicity” C.C
“If you get a chance to work with Leanne she will help you transform your behavior and shift your energy towards what serves you. I’m so grateful she has taught me to love myself just the way I am and to go deep and face my emotions head on. Leanne taught me to set boundaries and take care of me. Thank you for lifting me up”. J.P
"ETC has radically shifted my reality. ETC has transformed my beliefs that I was powerless, unworthy, unseen and unheard. For so long I felt stuck and helpless. ETC is a bright beacon of light shining light on the TRUTH. The truth is I am powerful, worthy, seen and heard! I matter! I am deserving of a healthy relationship and I no longer accept mistreatment in place of love. Thanks Leanne!" A.T
"Before I found Leanne, I had spent a year reading and watching everything I could get my hands on about narcissistic abuse. I went from simply being educated about it to being supported and coached in such a caring and understanding way that gave me the strength and validation to leave. If I wanted to stay, she would have certainly helped me with that too. That’s what is different with Leanne. She supports you with whatever you decide to do."
"Before ETC I was still trying to figure out both me and my husband. ETC helped me to focus solely on me and what I need and want in a relationship. I was able to let go of some things that were not helping me and had actually been hurting me. I gained a lot of confidence about myself and my own abilities. I feel like a capable and empowered woman now. I don’t know exactly what my future looks like but I know I can handle it."
"Before ETC, I was leaning toward leaving the relationship--and that's where I am now, except I feel much more "prepared" mentally and emotionally. I truly believe the boundary work (which I desperately needed to do) will benefit other relationships in my life -- and perhaps future relationships. I also learned some things about myself, including how the way I've shown up/reacted to my current relationship is often the way I'm showing up/reacting to other things in my life. This was a powerful realization for me--and was one of several "aha" moments."
"Before joining ETC, I knew my relationship was toxic but my coping was not getting me the change or feeling of stability and inner calm I desperately was seeking from others (friends, doctor, therapist.) Two plus years of personal therapy seemed lacking in the understanding of emotional abuse and how to help myself. An attempt to leave without support was unsuccessful. ETC has given me a clearer understanding on the cycle of abuse, tactics used to keep me in fear and under control in this relationship for years. I am now aware of how my silence, over-functioning, almost nonexistent boundaries and victim mentality contribute to abandonment of myself, codependency, reactive behaviours and avoidance of conflict. Unresolved childhood trauma and buried emotions added to my inner turmoil and inability to self regulate my moods. Learning to detach from negative interactions and conversation has been a huge positive shift in my self healing. The many layers of trauma need my attention for ongoing healing. Increasing selfcare, keeping routine while reinforcing my boundaries and SPEAKING my truth (and improving what and how I say it and positive self talk)is building my self confidence. Although I know I no longer wish to remain in this relationship, I am staying, for now, to work on myself in preparation. I feel prepared with a self care routine for my emotional and physical health; along with an exit strategy. Being aware of old ways of avoidance and fear; how to return to myself and seek support when taking the next steps is crucial for my success and growth. With divine gratitude, S.R."
"My partner and I have been inching toward separating for years, but we have a young daughter and separation would likely mean she and I moving to another town to be near my family. Over the past few months the discussions were getting more serious and there were a number of times where we decided to move forward with separating. My partner would have an overnight change of heart and the pattern would begin again. I was burned out, completely dissociated from myself and at a loss about how to proceed. Now I have taken ownership of my decision to stay in this relationship for now. I have always felt like I wouldn't leave without knowing I had tried everything, but couldn't accept that the thing I needed to try was prioritizing myself and my needs. I understand that, while I was not the cause of it, my codependency and lack of boundaries were enabling his emotionally abusive behaviour. Working on myself has given me clarity on what my boundaries are and I find myself setting them more consistently every day. I'm learning to trust myself more and worry about the future less."
"I was lost in the fog because I had not been true to myself due to strong codependent patterns. I learned that I need to practice self care. I understood that setting boundaries and enforcing them is a skill - it needs to be practiced consistently. And most importantly, I learned to take radical self responsibility and own my power. I am not a victim."
ENROLL IN END THE CYCLE EVOLVE
Have questions?

Frequently asked questions

This program has helped hundreds of women all over the world! 

While not a substitute for therapy, ETC will provide you with in-depth transformation, community support, responsive answers to your questions as they arise, and powerful tools and insights you won’t get in regular therapy. You can take this program along with therapy. It’s your choice.
I have offered a payment plan to make this easier, and also invite you to see whether your concerns are coming from fear, lack, and victim mentality. You are operating from present circumstances, not from where you want to be. While I would not advocate purchasing ETC if you can’t feed your family or pay your mortgage, I challenge you to consider that you may have fixed beliefs about money and spending on yourself. You receive a whole lot more from this program than you will with just one-hour counselling sessions each week. Something to keep in mind.

There are no cancellations or refunds.

Yes, the installment plan option is offered for your convenience to make it accessible for those who aren’t able to pay for the program in full. You are required to make all of your payments. Payments are debited every 30 days with the payment method you have on file. 

ETCE is designed for women who are still in the relationship, or who are separated but are still feeling entangled with their ex, and are seriously considering reconciliation. Maybe your partner has made some changes, and you want to know if it’s going to stick this time. ETCE will give you clarity and a step by step process to know if your relationship can, or should be saved before you make the decision. Before you decide to engage back in the relationship, I urge you to take ETC first.

Many women leave a relationship like this and return, statistics say 7 times, before leaving for good. It is also common to get sucked back in with manipulation and promises each time you try to leave. Being in ETCE as you formulate clarity, inner strength, and a plan for your exit, as well as preparing yourself emotionally and logistically, will increase the odds that when you do leave, it will be for good. Based on my work with hundreds of women in this program, having support as you leave and after you exit is invaluable. Leaving and staying no contact is the hardest thing you will have to do. 

You get out of anything that you put into it. Allocate about 5 hours per week for watching/listening to the material, study and notes/journalling, or any homework you have to do. Also, keep in mind, clients report ETCE did more for them in 30 days than months spent in therapy getting nowhere. If you focus and stay in the work you will experience profound transformation.

We do not make currency adjustments. Adjusting the currency for every person that requests it would be extremely time consuming, and an admin nightmare. USD is a standard and universal currency for global businesses, and 90% of our business expenses, including software and tools to house our online programs, are paid for in US dollars

 ETC is designed to get you out of overwhelm by taking very specific and focused ACTIONS. Right – action is the cure to overwhelm.

 I am no longer practicing as a counsellor, and the ETCE program is not counselling, it is a coaching and mentoring program. Therefore, this service is not covered by insurance.

You get 6 months of community access with your program. You can post any questions in this group!

Questions that aren't covered here about the program?
Email Support@Leanneoaten.com

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